On my drive home this morning, memories of a family I used to work with suddenly flooded my brain. Right after college I worked in social services for Kittitas County Head Start in Ellensburg. One of my duties was to conduct home visits with the families whose children attended the program. One particular family was very difficult for me to visit. Every surface was covered with something, and it was dark and small. Literally a shack, with a stench so intense I absolutely had to breathe through my mouth – one whiff and I would get instantly nauseous.
Poverty is ugly. Whether financial, spiritual, emotional or mental, poverty is a work of the devil. God never intended for us to live in depravity.
It can be really easy to turn away in disgust when we see how another person lives. Maybe you have a hard time with hoarders. Or addicts. Others struggle with those who hold no value for human life. But, I struggle with such animosity, as Jesus died for them, too. He loves them just as much as He does me. To see oneself as above one of these people would be to invalidate the cross and all it stands for.
I often wonder about people who are in such a bad place. Do they hoard to cover pain? Take drugs to cope with their reality? People are interesting, especially those who get really angry with another person’s depravity. It’s easy to judge. Possibly just as easy to understand.
Before you look down at another, or find them unlovely, consider what sort of dysfunction you walk in. Perhaps you are a bit cleaner on the outside, but possibly not on the inside. I know for me, the past few weeks have brought to light areas in my heart and mind that I had not visited for a long time. It’s been a time to look very honestly at who I am; who I am in those dark corners nobody can see.
To repent means to turn away, it means to take another road. It’s not a big, ugly word used to bring condemnation, but rather an opportunity to turn and make a change. A good change. Today I am repenting of my pre-judgements and personal ego that tells me my stuff isn’t as ugly as someone else’s. Today I am giving up my anger.
